Kushie is…Kushie basically.
We’ve had her for close to 12 weeks, I think. We got her on the 21st of June, and ever since then, we’ve had one vet visit after another. We’ve had her microchipped, and she’s had more antibiotics than I have in the lst year just since moving in with us. She’s almost [...]
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D Kai Wilson on August 26th, 2008
So I’ve spent the whole morning, when I should have been writing my zombie stories, chasing the Child support agency to find out what in the hell they’re playing at.
Long story incredibly short - we’ve been having to phone the CSA several times a month to get the payments the ex is sending them, found and sent on to me. This came to a head last month when they said they take 21 working days (that’s a month, more or less) to clear payments if they have an incorrect reference number. So July’s payment was going to be 21 working days too, cause we couldn’t get the reference number changed on the account before then. And guess what?
According to them, it hasn’t been paid AT ALL. Thier next step, apparently is ‘investigate’. My next step was ‘Financial ombusman’. Being far, my next step is ‘complain’ - but I’m far more well versed in this process than I’d like and was promised that the issues I’m seeing wouldn’t happen when last I complained, so I’m pushing it higher.
Highest in this country, as far as I’m aware, is the Financial overseer/ombudsman - I don’t *think* I can sue the CSA, so I have to follow procedure.
The gentleman I was speaking with offered to pass it to the debt collection department and I pointed out, very sweetly that as I’ve been told he’s already paid this month and last month, did they really want two charges of gross misconduct, from both sides, should the Financial Ombudsman find in my favor. I was told that they’d wait couple of days before contacting the debt department, just in case it was a mistake on thier end.
I’ve already said in every conversation I’ve had with them recently that no matter what they do, and how they attempt to make up for the mishandling of this part of my case, it’s all snowballed to having to be passed up the chain. That yes, I’d follow complaint procedures but that I’d had enough, and that I would be contacting the Financial Ombudsman unless they made a remarkable gesture of apology and put everything right. Knowing my dealings with them, as it’s never happened, I’m fairly ‘confident’ (and disgusted that I know it’ll go that way) that I’m going to be going to the financial overseer for the government and kicking up merry hell.
I guess what is the worst about this is all I want is the kid’s money. I want to be able to put money away in thier savings for stuff, and I want to be able to have money, on hand, to randomly choose to take the kids to the cinema, or buy shoes cause his lordship keeps wearing his out, or buy them the book they’ve just got to have, or take them to events near us. As it stands, for the last four months, I haven’t been able to rely on ANYTHING other than them messing me around, and it’s really pissed me off.
That said, it does mean I’ve got the prefect ‘angry’ on to finish my zombie piece.
Oh and we’re taking the cat to the vets this afternoon. Fingers crossed for her vaccination today!
D Kai Wilson on August 21st, 2008
Yesterday morning I got one of those ‘rude awakenings’. It’s been a slow week, the kids are home, and the cat is wheezy (she might have cat athsma - she might have an allergy to dust of all things - which is really bad in our house cause it’s constantly dusty - no matter how often I dust. So next cunning plan is to get rid of as much of the clutter as possible, so that if I need to dust, every day, I can without it taking me hours.
Yesterday though, was rough. Kinda expected, but rough. My writing, after all, seems to go in cycles like this. I get so far, I’m on the verge of ‘winning’ at the game of getting published and suddenly, everything falls apart. Two years ago (or so) I was scammed by a literary agency - this time, one book was caught by a scam (a ‘for TV book’) and six of the twelve queries I had out are now back as rejections. Two had been rejections on partials - which was really exciting, so at least it means I’m getting closer, but still, six at once was farily disheartening.
Yesterday, I was depressed. Angry even. It’s easy for people to say that we should take rejections in our stride, and I do, but I’m also only human, so I at least get one day of ill feeling.
This morning, I’ve decided that for the first time since moving, I’m not going to ‘top up’ my book queries that are out. I want to give my writing a complete overhaul, starting with writing more short stories - which, first, means reading books and making notes and ’stuff’. Mostly, I want to do something ‘nice’ for a change - I’m waaaay too obsessed with the ‘must get published’ side of things, and - for me at least - it isn’t healthy.
Publication is nice - of course, but it’s not the core reason I write. It might be later, but for now, I’ve forgotten the real reasons I write. And yes, it’s still a vocation/job. I just don’t need paid for it yet 
D Kai Wilson on August 19th, 2008
I was going to post this on semiskimmed, but it’s worth saying on my personal blog more than anything else.
I’ve always hated editing for one reason. I really don’t trust my gut when rejecting pieces any more - and I’ve always thought that since sitting my poetry course, though I can pin down exactly what I feel is wrong with a piece.
It’s not something that normally I’d even think about, but I’ve done 22 rejections, and one ‘errr….Managing editor….how do I handle (X) please’. Editing erotica is easy, it has to be said - not because it’s smutty, but because in many ways, it’s less subjective than many other kinds of writing. And you can spot the really REALLY bad stuff a mile off. Guess what I was working through today?
I love editing, don’t get me wrong, but it’s hard to point at things without sounding like a pedantic git. More to the point, I’ve really had to fight my corner with freinds in the past over my editing, and it’s left me gunshy of saying ‘no thanks’ to a piece. I’m always left with lingering guilt when it’s not complete pants, cause, y’know, what makes ME right and the authors wrong?
I guess I’ll get used to it again, given we’re into editing season again ;). Feeling self concious tends to be transient till I’ve had agreements back from the managing editors, or adjustments from them. Either way, I have to just keep reminding myself, for the moment, that I’m not a bad writer, or editor (I’ve never been called an ediot to my face yet ;)) and stop panicking I guess.
Anyway guys, night!
D Kai Wilson on August 19th, 2008
Well, I’m back to battling with the CSA again. They are ‘losing’ payments from the ex, and worse than that, they’re refusing to do anything about it. Last month they held the payment for 21 days (they claim this is the length of time it takes to ‘clear’ through thier system) and this month they are claiming that he hasn’t paid at all. (’this month’ being July). He’s further claiming that there’s been a problem with August’s payments, so things are fairly tight around here at the moment. And I’ve still got school uniforms to buy.
I’m also getting ready for my second year of Uni. I’m not as up tight as I was this time last year (but we’re still in the same general level of financial oddness, with the budget being knocked a couple of miles sidewards, due to the stupidity of above. To counter this, next year, I’m going to do my level best to actually HAVE savings come the summer break. Or a regular income of some description. Freelancing is nice, right up until you get caught in a recession - I’ve done ok, but it’s not been easy this summer.
And, to ensure that I’m presenting my ‘best’ front, I’m also making over several of my sites - that way, when I stick something in my bio, it doesn’t look completely odd to refer people to sites that are half done. It’s going to be a LOT of work - but this place, semiskimmed and booksbyKai are first. From there, thewriters/wahmshost and a couple of other sites are going to cascade back onto static sites, and then I’m going to start tackling the books I’ve been threatening for the last six months. Because, simply - I can. 
To that end, though, I DO have a favor for everyone - over at http://semiskimmedcola.com - I’m wondering about my bios, basically. If you’ve got any thoughts, I’d REALLY appreciate them (it will be x-posted to Lj, just this once, from semiskimmed)
It’s important to note, at this point that though I have “writer’s block” or “burned out itis” it doesn’t - really - help me to use it as an excuse. I’ve got a huge, massive todo list that I can work through, and it’s important to me that I start doing so. I make my own choices - I choose my own path. Writing is a pleasure for me, but it’s about time I started treating it like a job.
Laters!
D Kai Wilson on August 16th, 2008
Kidlets are home - and I’ve seen several movies this week - so if you’re really not into mild (or not so mild) spoilers, I’d really skip this post. Herein lies reviews of Wall-E, The Dark Knight and Mama Mia.
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D Kai Wilson on August 14th, 2008
For one - I really need to start asking people for more proof.
Of things in general.
For two. I’m going to see John Barrowman at the Festival in Cheltenham. I’ve recently discovered the person(s) I’ve been exchanging emails with, over the course of the last year aren’t who they claim they are (like an hour ago) - my beloved managed to talk me into looking at the ‘better’ side of it (i.e I’ve had thier hosting company look into thier site, terminate thier account, send information to the people they were inpersonating, which means, though I’m being a bitch, I’m protecting other people), and will be writing articles about this, because - y’know, if I had a tattoo that says ‘naieve’ I’d feel much better, cause I’d be labelled that way.
I’m actually fairly numb to be honest. That’s a year that I’ve wasted on getting to know people, that they claimed to be someone they are not. It’s *kinda* the story of the internet, but this has really put me through the wringer.
*spoilers*
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D Kai Wilson on August 11th, 2008
This last week we’ve chilled, we’ve cleaned, we’ve played Sins of a Solar Empire. I really miss the kids, but they’re having a blast. They’ve been to Loudon Castle, Leith Water World, and are going to the zoo and doing lots of fun stuff with thier dad. The smallest is behaving fairly well - which is great.
So we’ve got some great stuff lined up for the rest of the week.
Monday: more house stuff - silly games in the evening
Tuesday: More house stuff - Twilight spa in the evening (my beloved and I are going)
Wednesday (free) - Agone in the evening
Thursday - (free) - Dark Knight at the IMAX
Friday - (free?) - Mama Mia!(or something else) with Sara
Satuday - Collect the kids near Leeds.
It’ll be good to have them back, of course, but we’re fitting in a lot between now and then, which is also cool. Most of it involves cleaning, decluttering, and more - we’ve got boxes of linens that we’re going to donate to the local charity shop, books and some other stuff - I’m guessing that I’ll have much more to donate over the next couple of days as I clean out cuboards and more. We’ve been here two years so anything still in boxes will be going in the bin/on ebay/to the charity shop - depending on how it looks, and how useful I think it is to other people. I don’t ebay much, so it’ll be interesting to see how that goes.
I’m also going to fit lots of writing in, where I can. I’ve got some stories that need finished, and I’m determined to finish at least two 30 day outlines. Which means less Sins, unfortunatly. It’s such a fun game, but once you get playing, time just kinda slips away. We’ve finished three 5 hour+ games this weekend.
D Kai Wilson on August 6th, 2008
I’ve spent the last two of the last five days commuting - introducing the cat to family members (she was kinda funny when we spent time with Gregor dog (a border terrier) cause she fuzzed up and growled but didn’t actually do anything. Mom likes her, Dave’s dad likes her - everyone likes her.
We dropped the kids off - we spent time with lots of freinds - we spent more time with lots of freinds (waves to everyone!) went to a great meal, a brilliant show (Otis Lee Crenshaw) and spent time just chilling. The drive home was surprisingly easy - Kushie only yowled cause her mat in her cage was wet and slept most of the way back.
Saturday - Kushie was really unhappy travelling, but we think it was because we left too early and she didn’t get to use her litter box - once she’d made a mess in her carry case (which, of course, we changed) she went to sleep. We travelled really well - she yowls a bit, but it’s fairly understandable given I don’t think she’s ever travelled somewhere without being dumped there, so we’ve had to keep reassuring her . On arriving, we went and dropped off the cat, and went to see family, before my beloved dropped me off at moms, and I took the kids to see Wall-e. It was worth it. It was also great to see my uncle. Mom wasn’t back from Egypt yet, so sleep was achieved, around midnight.
Sunday - We got up, the small was a nightmare - she continued to be awful the whole day. We went for lunch, we hung out and did stuff. We went to see mom when she got back from Egypt, and dropped the kids off, (they are spending 13 days with thier father, all going well) before going to freinds for Pizza and hanging out.
Monday - went into town with the camera in the morning. I got a lot of nice snaps (which I’ll post in about a week, once I’ve fixed my gallery page) and one stunning one, before going to meet my other half’s mom for lunch. Lunch achieved, we headed off to have coffee with Edith, and then went to Black Lion to buy some games (I was thwarted in picking up both Cold City and 3:16 which lead me to sulk) then back to my other half’s dad for tea. And then we went to Keith’s for games.
Tuesday - more photos, more coffee (with Gregor this time), then we went home to get ready for tea. We went for said meal, then laughed our asses off at Otis Lee Crenshaw before going home. Sleep, once again achieved.
Wednesday - we got everything packed, took everything out to the car, took the cat to mom’s - mom liked the cat, the cat didn’t like the dog but it was ok, they didn’t fight. We got into the car - drove to Grenta Green (NOT MARRIED!), got lunch and some chocolate from the outloet shop and achieved much misshapes. We got home, curled up and will - soon - fall asleep. Kushie is just delighted to be home and has given every edge tonnes of love.
The rest of our ‘holiday’ contains things like going to chapel Spa together to relax - going to the I-max in Brum to see the Dark Knight (and wander around) - Judder for a birthday celebration and just - generally - spending lots of time in calm, quiet chilling ways. I don’t know what the nitty gritty of it is going to be other than tomorrow we’re staying home. I’ll probably spend it cleaning the kids rooms to be honest. Though I might wait till next week
Writing should also be happenening once I finish letting it percolate.
D Kai Wilson on August 2nd, 2008
I’m currently sitting on my Mom’s couch - my other half and our cat is at his dad’s (cause my stepdad is allergic, and cause I’ve still got the kids till tomorrow evening) thinking about the last time I was here on my own.
It was before my tattoo (which came up in conversation today too), it was before my other half, but only just. And my world slid about eight inches sidewards weekend.
A lot of good came out of it, but I spent a lot of the drive up thinking about what I’ve done in the last 12 years. Most of it, not good, or at the very least, unremarkable.
I’m slowly coming to terms with that though too. It’s not as if everything needs to be perfect - it’s more important that the things I do at least give me room to grow.
The next two weeks, from tomorrow, are going to be the longest time I haven’t seen my kids. I’m getting photos before they leave, so I’ve got nice images of them on my laptop, and then, I’m going to drop them off with their dad, probably have a little cry, and then go visit with freinds, go see some shows at the festival, and generally decompress as best I can.
There are two theories as to why I’m not writing - one is I’m HORRIBLY sick over everything that’s gone on this year - my youngest’s problems - adopting the perfect cat, only to discover how sick she is (she’s sick, not dying) - losing my grandfather, and my great aunt this year. Other stuff that sounds really bad when I talk about it in veiled ways, and I know it isn’t, but the other stuff I’ve put behind me - that’s been long overdue for settling down, and is at last something I can stop paying attention to as much. I’ll never let my guard down, but at least I know things are sorted out now. Sorta.
The other is I’m burned out.
Both technically relate to one another, and both are solved by taking this time to do all of the things I enjoy. So.
Lots of photography. Botanical gardens one day this week, perhaps. Festival stuff. Photos. Seeing as many of my close freinds as I can (though, I’m more than aware that there are some that we just can’t see, cause of thier plans, or cause of their work). Spending time doing things that’s just me and my other half. We’re doing everything from going to the spa together for an evening, to going to see The Dark Knight at a ‘local’ IMAX.
As far as I can tell, we’re staying in Edi until Wednesday. And now…I’m off to play Guitar Hero on Tour on my DS. 
